Jesper was drunk when he messaged Mat and in truth, he remembers about 70% of it. It was the first part he doesn't fully remember because as the conversation went, he got soberer and soberer, so the important bits were closer to his right mind. But some of it did get lost. He assumes he was a bit of a prick, he's not been at his best for a long time. But Mat did say he'd meet him.
It would be justified if he simply never showed up though.
Jesper is not a stranger to shame. In fact, shame is an emotion he knows better than most. He felt ashamed of being a Grisha growing up because his father hated/feared it, he was ashamed when his addiction dropped him out of school into the gutter, he's drowned in shame about gambling for years, including up to only a few months ago. But he is used to that being the major source of his shame, as bad behavior isn't very common for him.
He stands when Mat comes into view and also looks away, to the side, embarrassed. There is also still some residual anger and hurt in him too, it's not as if he is entirely past the way it all made him feel. It just isn't the primary way he feels anymore.
"I'm sorry." It has to be the first thing he says, obviously. It has to be the first real words between them. He was the fuck up. He's not a prideful person in truth. He usually sees himself pretty clearly. "For what I said to you that day and how I acted."
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It would be justified if he simply never showed up though.
Jesper is not a stranger to shame. In fact, shame is an emotion he knows better than most. He felt ashamed of being a Grisha growing up because his father hated/feared it, he was ashamed when his addiction dropped him out of school into the gutter, he's drowned in shame about gambling for years, including up to only a few months ago. But he is used to that being the major source of his shame, as bad behavior isn't very common for him.
He stands when Mat comes into view and also looks away, to the side, embarrassed. There is also still some residual anger and hurt in him too, it's not as if he is entirely past the way it all made him feel. It just isn't the primary way he feels anymore.
"I'm sorry." It has to be the first thing he says, obviously. It has to be the first real words between them. He was the fuck up. He's not a prideful person in truth. He usually sees himself pretty clearly. "For what I said to you that day and how I acted."